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|Every year brings a new physical trauma. It began occuring when I first started to walk and has continued ever since.|
|I have always been extremely clumsy. I have tripped over my own feet, walked into walls/corners, ran into parked cars, fell out of trees and other high places, scraped myself from falling onto pavement so often that I resembled a walking scab... etc... etc... Such circumstances can obviously be explained as a problem which I had with perception. Others could only be explained as occurring due to plain bad luck- Being stung by a bee in the neck, getting my skull cracked by a rock some neighborhood kid with bad aim threw at a kid which I happened to be standing next to, receiving lacerations on my back from an angry german shepherd, having both my eyes swollen closed due to poison ivy on my face... etc.. etc... I have dislocated a good number of joints, have mysteriously contracted infectious diseases, received cuts requiring stitches, and have had major organs be on the brink of failure. Blah, blah, blah...|
The good news for me is that I have become less accident prone over the years. The bad news- I AM GETTING OLD AND DON'T FUCKING HEAL AS WELL AS I USED TO.
Last week, 2 days after my birthday, I was washing dishes and was granted the pleasure of slicing my hand on a broken glass. Fucking washing dishes. FREAK ACCIDENT! I watched the glass break, and helplessly witnessed my hand descend into the sharp straight edge of the broken off area. It happened so quickly that my aging reflexes could not prevent it.
The cut was pretty small and it actually did not hurt. I spent almost an hour debating with my boyfriend whether or not I should go to the emergency room. Not having any medical insurance, I obviously wanted to avoid any extraneous bills since we are dirt poor. We finally decided that it might be a good idea to go just in case I had tiny pieces of glass inside of the cut. So I waited the obligatory 3 hours in the ER. No glass in the cut. Yay! Needed stitches? I received 2 stitches on the inside and 4 on the out. For a cut which is barely half an inch. But the doctor made it seem like no big deal so I went on my merry way, $700 more in debt than I was before.
I went back to the ER after the recommended healing time of 8 days to get my stitches removed. It was then that I found out that my pinky finger, along with that whole side of my right hand was completely numb. Being a veteran of experiencing nerve damage, I was not alarmed.. nerves grow back. Weeee! But I could not move that silly finger upwards to the level of the others. What the fuck! The doctor, whom did not stitch my cut, refused to take out the stitches not only because he thought it was not healed yet, but because he felt that I severed a tendon. According to him I need fucking plastic surgery to reconnect whatever the fuck makes my finger work.
So here I am, still stitched and fucking furious while my hand tries to heal. I can't afford plastic surgery and all I want is for my right hand to work properly since I kind of fucking need it! You never realize how much you really need that little pinky son of a bitch until it refuses to work.
I'd rather settle for all the earlier incidents of my youth occurring every day a million times over. I'm just getting old & oh so tired of dealing with this shit!