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Stories Comments Both
relationships Grow the Fuck Up
by HappyCouchTyrant
gfd messages
 (suckafuck@your.moms) on Apr 9, 2012 12:40:34 PM

If you were logged in, you could vote for this story!
I get it. You hurt. I get it. You're miserable. I get it. You can't get over it. I get it. I'm the only thing you'll ever love. I get it. You need me.

I don't fucking care.
GET IT?!
 
Once upon a time, when I was very young and stupid, I got married. I can't really explain why I felt getting married would be a good idea. I just thought it was.

I was married for three years. The first year was terrible. A lot of unregulated jealousy (on both sides) and a shit ton of turning to the threat of divorce during a fight. But we struggled onward, and survived the first year of marriage.

The second year was easiest. By then we were ridiculously confident about our relationship. Nothing could destroy it. We were one, goddammit, and nothing could change that. I worked, he worked, things were fine. And then I got pregnant.

Hooray. Now I have a kid. Pregnancy was actually wonderful. Our marriage was doing so damn well. And then I had the baby. And I started going to school. My husband quit school, quit his job, refused to help with the baby, and pretty much stayed glued to his Xbox every day.

Year three was right after baby, right before I realized that something needed to be done. I talked. I must have had a talk with him at least once a week every week for the next 8 months. I told him he needed to help out. Nothing. I told him he needed to work or go to school. Nothing. I told him he could at least talk to me and make me feel like maybe I fucking exist. Nothing.

I threw him out. I was fucking done. I didn't want to deal with a man-child for the rest of my life, while trying to get my own life back on track AND raise a child. And I shouldn't fucking have to.

All of this was one year ago today. Terrible. I have a boyfriend now. He's sweet, he's doing something with his life, he's supports me staying in school. He loves my child, and my child loves him in return. We are, in my own opinion, doing damn well. I'm happy, he's happy, baby's happy. Everybody's fucking happy.

Except my ex-husband. He's fucking miserable.

My boyfriend (God bless him) is nice enough to allow my ex to stay over our house so he can interact with the baby. I feel that he has that right, even if he never wanted to play with the baby before. He is getting better. Going to JobCorps now, which is good. And he is more interested in what the baby is doing than before. He's a great help around the house. I genuinely think he's changed.

There's just one problem.

He wants me to take him back and fix our marriage. I don't want to. I am happy with my current relationship. I love my boyfriend, and I don't feel that way about my ex. I just fucking don't. I can't make feelings I don't fucking have suddenly appear just because he suddenly realized that Holy shit, I'm a fucking human being that appreciates a little fucking attention. I don't know what the fuck he expects me to do.

Wait, that's a lie. I know exactly what he expects me to do. He expects me to suddenly look at a man I have been in love with for just over a year and tell him to fuck off, because my ex suddenly realized that he was required to do stuff to maintain a relationship. Not fucking happening.
He expects me to forget what it was like FOR A SOLID FUCKING YEAR to be ignored by someone who once claimed he loved me.

And men, don't get all confused. When I say ignored, I mean we would go days without talking to each other. And I realize conversation is a two-way thing. Believe me, I fucking tried. But a person can only handle so much "Mmm-hmm" and "hmm" before they realize that they're not really having a conversation at all.

He won't get over me. Everytime he calls, (And we have a kid together who is only a baby, otherwise I would just stop contact) he asks me why I won't just be willing to our marriage a second chance, why won't I try? Blah blah blah.

I don't know how to tell him any more clearly. I have given him hundreds of chances. Everytime I told him I would leave if he didn't get his act together and start actually being a member of the family instead of a meat bag on the couch glued to a controller I would leave, and I didn't, that counts as a second chance. He wants me to love him the way I used to. I don't fucking want to.

I want to be able to be friends, so that way our kid doesn't come out all fucked up as the product of a bad divoce. I want things to somewhat resemble a stable family life. And I can't do that with my Ex. No matter how hard I fucking try.

I'm tired of looking like the bitch because a full grown man is crying everytime he looks at me. I'm tired of being uncomfortable because every five seconds he tells me "I love you." Fuck your love. Seriously. Take your fucking love and such it in your fucking ass. I hope it fucking rots in there.

I'm sick of it. No more hanging out all together as a family. He has his time, and I'll have mine. Fuck it. I'll be the fucking bitch if it will give me just a little fucking sanity and piece of mind back.

Seriously. Fuck love. Fuck Marriage. Gays want marriage? I say let 'em fucking have it. I don't fucking want it.

[ Comment on this story ]


    An excellent first GFD.
    by TheChisa(come@me.bro)
    gfd messages
    		 on Apr 9, 2012 02:34:05 PM
    (#32148)
    You show promise, young padawan.
    [Reply to this comment]
    Don't lie... dunce
    by murdersgalore(wacking@yourfuneral.cum)
    gfd messagesMSN
    		 on Apr 9, 2012 02:35:48 PM
    (#32149)
    You fucking love every minute of it.
    [Reply to this comment]
    I understand how tough that can be.
    by grandtheftcondom(grandtheftcondom@gmail.com)
    gfd messages
    		 on Apr 9, 2012 02:44:28 PM
    (#32150)
    I'm separated from my husband and we have kids together.

    Like you, I can't get my ex to leave menthe fuck alone. When you find a solution that wouldn't entail me changing zip codes or hiring someone to "take care of him" let me know.

    However, I have a saving grace. I'm comfortable being a bitch,
    [Reply to this comment]
      The solution is simple in theory.... thumbs up
      by murdersgalore(wacking@yourfuneral.cum)
      gfd messagesMSN
      		 on Apr 9, 2012 03:06:43 PM
      (#32151)
      ....but difficult in practice.

      Basically, you have to kill all hope. Words aren't enough. You really gotta let these jealous exes know it's over. Here's a few suggestions....

      1. Fuck one of his family members (20 bonus points if it's his dad)
      2. Take a baseball bat to him without provocation. Don't wait for the next argument.
      3. Make a sex tape with your new boyfriend and let him "accidentally" find it.
      4. Tell him you have crabs. (10 bonus points if you actually do. 100 bonus points if you caught them from his dad.)
      5. Embarrass him in public with stories of his sexual failures.
      6. Stop bathing.
      7. Stop shaving.
      8. Train the kids to call the new guy daddy. (100000 points if it's their grandpa.)
      9. Pretend you are having car problems and you need him to check it out. While he test drives it, report it stolen.
      10. Time out sex with your new guy on the couch 10 minutes before a visitation. Make sure he sits in the wet spot.
      11. Reconcile the relationship and begin with very small doses of arsenic.
      ...And the ultimate relationship killer....

      ....Become best friends with his mother and new girlfriend.

      You may be thinking "But, Murders!! He's the father of my children! I don't wanna fuck my kids up!". Ahh, don't worry so much. Good kids are fucking boring anyway. Heartache, trauma, psychosis, these things build character.


      [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
    Bravo
    by OMFGGFD(hate@me.motherfucker)
    gfd messagesMSN
    		 on Apr 10, 2012 08:44:09 AM
    (#32163)
    I was scared you would be another blackbox, or cyanidecandies, or that other one. Seriously, I was about to vote 1 just because I didn't recognize your name. But, this is at least the best story on the first page.
    [Reply to this comment]
    10 for vitriol! heart
    by The Gaborg(Sidekick in my own life)
    gfd messages
    		 on Apr 10, 2012 08:28:23 PM
    (#32172)
    And ditch the prick!
    Seriously. You're not going to fuck up your kid; he's already got a stable environment with you and your new guy. Remote-potato needs to fuck off and get a life.
    [Reply to this comment]
      I voted for
      by murdersgalore(wacking@yourfuneral.cum)
      gfd messagesMSN
      		 on Apr 10, 2012 10:06:29 PM
      (#32178)
      working it out. You could make him take out the trash, do dishes or laundry, change the oil in the Previa, babysit, cook, all those things no one really wants to do. It might even bring you and the new guy closer together.
      [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
        Exactly
        by The Gaborg(Sidekick in my own life)
        gfd messages
        		 on Apr 12, 2012 02:13:52 PM
        (#32182)
        And if the gentleman doth protest too much that he's "doing all of this for you baby, for us", let him know in no uncertain terms that nonono dear, that train left the station a long time ago.
        This is what he gets now as due payment for being an asshole back then.

        Then turn around and grind your butt against New Guy's crot- no wait, I'm getting out of line here.


        (Man, thank God I wasn't born a woman because I'd be one vindictive bitch from hell...)
        [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
          Lol....
          by murdersgalore(wacking@yourfuneral.cum)
          gfd messagesMSN
          		 on Apr 13, 2012 06:44:22 AM
          (#32188)
          I'd be the biggest whore you ever knew. I would have retired from the pole years ago after my married-business-man-lover paid for my new titties and would have starred in some of the most ridiculous porn you ever saw. Then, at the point in my life when gravity reminds me that even the surgeons blade is no match for father time, I would start a halfway house in Vegas for abused young adult women who were molested, battered, orphaned, etc. and trick them out to all of my old Johns. I would die a very rich she-pimp.
          [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
    You guys... thumbs upheart
    by HappyCouchTyrant(suckafuck@your.moms)
    gfd messages
    		 on Apr 16, 2012 01:56:34 PM
    (#32233)
    Are by far the most interesting group of psych ward escapees I have ever met.

    And that is said with the greatest amounts of respect, love, and humor. :)

    Thanks for the advice, by the way.
    [Reply to this comment]
    I've just reread this, thumbs up
    by The Gaborg(Sidekick in my own life)
    gfd messages
    		 on Apr 28, 2012 07:04:05 PM
    (#32430)
    and the profile of your ex as one passive-aggressive dickwad came through clearer upon second reading.

    It wouldn't surprise me if he fell right back into the couch as soon as you (hypothetically) ditched New Guy and went running back into his lackluster arms.

    So don't.
    Just sayin'.
    [Reply to this comment]
      Hehe
      by The Gaborg(Sidekick in my own life)
      gfd messages
      		 on Apr 28, 2012 07:06:59 PM
      (#32431)
      Now I feel kinda like a dick for badmouthing some dude I never even met.

      What can I say, it's a slow night... a guy's gotta hate something.
      [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]
        Meh
        by HappyCouchTyrant(suckafuck@your.moms)
        gfd messages
        		 on Apr 29, 2012 01:33:59 PM
        (#32434)
        You're not a dick. You're making assumptions based on evidence that you have access to. If he wants his side of the story heard, he can get his own goddamn profile and tell it.
        [Reply to this comment]  [Parent]

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